Yesterday I got in the car with my eldest son and put the destination in my SatNav.  The SatNav pretty much told me to drive straight for 270 miles and then turn right!  Ok, so that is a slight exaggeration but it’s not far off the truth.

I was driving my son from our home in Bucks to Newcastle to collect the keys to his new house and move him in to it, in advance of his second year at Uni.  And my intention was to drive back home the same day, also with my son on board as he’s home for the whole Summer 😊.

Driving 540 miles in a day is not ideal, let’s face it.  So was it a strange choice?  Possibly, but here’s how I made that choice.

• I took the pressure off having to return the same day by ensuring I didn’t have any client sessions in my diary today and my son took the day off his Summer job.
• I took overnight ‘stuff’ with me in case;
  • The house was particularly unhygienic and needed a deep-clean, which meant it would be too late to drive back.
  • We’d got delayed or stuck in traffic which would have made it too late to drive back.
  • I was exhausted and couldn’t face another 5 hours on the M1.
• I looked at the ecology of the situation and asked myself how does this choice fit with my values, my beliefs and the other commitments in my life, as well as my son’s other commitments.
  • If I drive back we can both sleep in our own beds and get a good night’s sleep.
  • We can both have the whole day today to rest and relax and do whatever we want to do.
  • Getting up after a (probably) uncomfortable night’s sleep, having to stop for breakfast to feed the youth who needs to eat a mountain of food before he can function in the morning, and then driving for 5 hours is going to take most of the day. In my head, this would equate to 2 days driving rather than just 1.

I tend to be a “just get on with it” type of person and don’t prolong the inevitable pain, when it comes to having to do something I’m not really looking forward to.  I tend to choose to think “the sooner I start, the sooner I’ll be finished”.

But over and above the practicalities and the mindset strategies, my strategy of choice was to stay in the moment.

I consciously and continuously reminded myself how grateful I was for the car safely transporting us to where we needed to be (without a warning light in sight).  How grateful I was for the free-flowing traffic so I was able to stay pretty much in fifth or sixth gear the whole way to the point my left leg started to feel a bit redundant!  How grateful I was that the student accommodation had been newly decorated after the previous residents had moved out and was modern and spotless, so no cleaning was required at all.  How grateful I was to have the opportunity to hang out with my boy; to chat, share stories, having the odd meaningful conversation about Quantum Theory (that might have been a bit more me than him actually), listen to music or just share comfortable silences.

And as we tuned into different radio stations as we passed through different counties and took in the differing landscape and names of many different towns and villages I’d never heard of, despite my nearly 52 years on this island, I found myself tuned in to the present moment.

Whilst it would have been easy to be pulled into unhelpful thoughts about how many junctions we still had to pass through or how much time we still had to drive for I recognised those thoughts would only lead to frustration and tiredness in my mind and body.  So instead I used a strategy I use when I’m running of “just run the mile you’re in”, except I chose to “just drive the junction I’m in”.

And my son and I had a bet about what time we’d arrive home; he went for 8:57pm and I went for 9:05pm.

Whilst it would have been so easy to cheat, being the driver, we arrived home at 9:01pm.  And by my reckoning that means we both won.

And I reckon we did, in many ways.

For my son, he got to move into his new house and see where he’s going to be spending the next year of his life and get home in time to spend the evening (and following day) with his girlfriend.

For me, confirmation that I made the correct choice for me.  For many people that wouldn’t have been the correct choice but for me it was.  Whilst I wasn’t attached to the outcome of driving home the same day if it wasn’t practical or realistic, I was happy to stay in the moment and go with the flow, trusting that my body and my intuition would give me the answer I needed.

And the glass of wine at 9:02pm was amazing!

…and I would drive 500 more.

With love Sarah xx